18 November 2008

Loony tunes

It is not unusual for organisations to receive letters from nut-cases, but it is rather strange for them to pass them on to the news media, and for the latter to publish them in full, without comment. This one was apparently sent to the Evangelical Seminary of Southern Africa. It's a strange strange world we live in, Master Jack.

The Times - My power and glory, your faith everlasting:
I will, however, need more than a gun and a Bible to reconstruct these Pyrrhonian backsliders. The Dogon believe they were created by gods who came from the sky in space ships. They are madder than Tom Cruise and I will need 20 crates of single-malt whisky, 500 condoms and a thousand aspirin if I am to convince them that it is not the god Lebe, but the Almighty Himself who visits them at night in the form of a serpent and licks their skins in order to purify them and infuse them with life.

As one of your newest recruits, my motto will be: Convert Or Die. I have already printed the T-shirts so you have to give me the job or I will sue your holy ass to kingdom come.

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